Let's get Intimate.. But not really.

That's right. I'm following the crowd.
Posting 7 random, very censored, but still unique/embarrassing facts about myself
(cause that's what everyone does).
Hopefully these facts will be news to you.
If not, you definitely know me too well.
P.S. I was tagged by the beautiful Kelsey. Don't know her?
Then just stalk her.

• UNO. I have conversations with a miniature me inside my head. But It's not a human version of me. It's me in Dr. Seuss form.
• ZWEI. I have been using the same retainer since I got my braces out in 8th grade. It's super gross.
• TROIS. Three nights ago I dreamt I was a baby mama for a girl in my math class. She told me today she might be pregnant.  
• FOUR. I like to pretend I live in a world in the times of Jane Austen. Ideal, my name would be Elizabeth Bennet, and my lover would be Mr. Darcy. It'd be a great story.
• VIJF. My preferred exercise playlist (because obviously I exercise a lot. Pfft) consists of soundtrack music from the following major motion pictures: Gladiator, Avatar, Braveheart, Harry Potter, & Tangled.
• SECHS. The BEST place for me to think is outside. In some scenic picture. Equipped with a sunset, some beautiful mountains, some Mindy Gledhill sounds and my scriptures.
• 7. I have 7 best friends. And I love them all.

Oh. I'm tagging Kate, Kenna, Brooke, Ash, Lyss, Cailey, & Wyatt

My weekends are cooler than your weekends.

Definitely more epic than last saturday night (go here to see),
this saturday will obviously go in my scrapbook. "Are you a scrapper??"
We shopped.
We baked.
We pranked.

We taped Cailey to a poll.

We laughed.

We wet our pants.

We chatted with molesters. 

Then they called the cops on us. 

You know, for tying Cailey to a poll.

We snapped a few photos.

Oh. And I'm pretty sure Alyssa was stoned during most of this.

Quotes of the night.

"If I was a molester, I would warn kids about molesters.
Sorry, I warned you."

"Someone fart. Let's categorize it."

"Categorize this!"

Uh oh.

Stacie 

+

very funny situations

+

a ridiculously full bladder

=

_____________ (fill in the blank)

P.S. It's pretty obvious.

On a Whim

One time (on Thursday) Cailey chopped off 7 inches of my hair.

Please ignore the stupid face.

Then we go to lunch. Cailey says the follow
while enjoying her sinful apple turnover.
"I just entered turnover heaven." Takes a hefty bite.
"Ice cream hotel treats me oh so well."
Fun Fact: I bought a pumpkin body wash that smells like Thanksgiving. But I hid it. I'm waiting for the right moment to whip it out, and seduce a handsome man with my sweet smell of holiday desserts.

Whilst at work, I was informed that I could leave early.
It was a slow day at Menchie's.
Why? Because it's a girl store. And its raining. What does that have to do with anything?? Oh, don't fret. I'll explain.

That could only mean two things: they (the girls) are either in their sweats snuggled up alone, enjoying a romantic chick flick, wishing they were kissing a charming fellow in the rain. OR. They are actually kissing a charming fellow in the rain. Which apparently means frozen yogurt is not a priority.
Because obviously thats all a girl has to worry about... pfft. Duh.
I know this because that's what I did after my early release.
Snuggled in sweats, and watched a movie. But, instead of the sappy chick flick, I was entertained by the comical Jack Black in School of Rock.
What a productive Friday night.

BBQ w/ JIMMER @ GRANDMA'S

It was a grand event at the Norton home today. Why? Jimmer came to BBQ with the fam. Say What?? True Story. Pictures will be posted soon. Basically this is why. It brought us together to share a carnivorous and a vegetarian meal. He sat 4 feet away from me, Sam, Alese, and Hilary while he ate. But, (this is the greatest part) we didn't sit next to him, for we were there first. HE sat next to US. NBD, or VSD as Sam would say (very small deal).

WOW. Where did that come from?

Pressure. Recently, my mama asked me if I feel pressure to get married. I said no. But I sure do welcome the idea. Apparently, I'm on the hunt, like the ultimate creep.
 Example: I see a cute boy. First thing I do? Check for the ring. WOW. I'm cool. Where did that come from? I'm only 18! I have big plans! And I don't even know the stinkin' kid. Sure he's handsome enough to be in a chick flick, but he could possibly be the world's next Hitler. No one knows. Let's just say someone needs to put me on a leash. Or blindfold me so my creep disease doesn't get any worse than it already is.

Before I put that to rest, here is a story. 

I saw a red head today. About 50 yards in front of me, coming my way. He was so handsome, I should have touched him just to see if he was real. Basically he was Rupert Grint. In the flesh. We made eye contact. He smiled a friendly smile, and I smiled back.. I think (most likely I just creeped him out). Check for ring? He has one. All hope fades. Dangit. He has a lady. He passes. I double-take. WAIT! It was on his middle finger! Hope is back, but alas, the boy is gone. 

That's my life for you. But seriously, what do I expect? 

A pro-status story like Megs? I don't think so.

I waste my time, obviously.

Honestly, where have I been? I just discovered this website. Please be understanding if you've already seen this before. It amuses me quite a bit.

 Truly, it is a robot in disguise.

Oh deer. 

Mmmm. I'd go through puberty again, just to have that handsome fellow. 

 The truth about bras.

I like him.

Terrified of midgets.

 Longest plane ride ever.

Ghetto Swimming pool.

 Picture frame family?

Meanwhile, at the Kool-Aid house.

 Obviously I do.

To waste more of your valuable time, go here.

Dinner Table Conversations: Part 1

It's a proven fact that my family is comical. Especially my 16 year old sister, Alese. For example. Today during dinner. We had chicken curry. It was great.  Anyways, her iPod was playing up in her room, and was just loud enough to hear what song was playing. Stephen by Ke$ha came on, and this was the conversation.
Stacie: (singing) "Stteeeeeephen. Whyyyyyy won't you call me!?"
Mom: (completely oblivious to the music. She's basically def) "What are you talking about?"
Alese: "That's such a weird name. You think she'd date someone with a name like.... Astroid!"
Mom: "Who are you talking about?!? Who is Stephen?"

Word to the Wise. My sister will be dateable in a week. Tell your hot man friends. She's a cutie.

Like I said, we're comical.

Laugh Attack

Typically, we watch a movie. Last night, we boycotted the idea. Here is what we did.

-Met a mexican exchange student. His name is Paco. He became Bro0oke Thorley's first kiss. Apparently that's how they greet each other where he's from. It was so rich.
-Bro0oke also earned a dollar. Because she ate ants. Like a two year old.
-We made masks out of paper plates, cruised state street, and creeped people out.
-Scared the ish out of Cailey as she was leaving work. Picked her up, when to Article Circle and...
-Ordered courtesy cones in a smoker voice. Picked them up in our masks, and asked for a bandaid.
-Played Apples to Apples reversed, and somehow made it interesting enough that I was crying from laughing so hard, as well as kate. Bro0oke ended up in her fetal "pee your pants" position more than usual. And Cailey gave little Brooke a wedgie and stuck her hands down her pants. I love my friends.

Bro0oke in action. About to eat the ant. 

Little Brooke. Hers killed me everytime.

Kate was stoned.

Cat and Dog. It didn't work well.

Resisting Vandilism

Truly, honestly, if you are 18 or older, your life is incredibly uninteresting. No offense. I'm talking about myself as well. Lately, I've been resisting ridiculously strong desires to do stupid things. Things that if I did now, It would go on my permanent record, and my life long dream of being a Kick A cop would be ruined.

Like this:

Probably just to Kate's house though. She could clean it up. 

Steal me some of these:

So I can reserve my own parking spots. And leave them on Brigham Well's porch.

Obviously this as well:

It's immature, but its comical. 

Add some immature car art to that list:

No one was pregnant.

Another personal car art favorite:

"I SPANK HOBOS!"

Try it. But don't get caught.

Nappage

Note to self:
Taking 4 hour naps after school is the most disorienting thing you could do. I mean, seriously?? I'm confused enough as it is. I woke up at dinner time and almost got in the shower. Also, we had breakfast for dinner. That sure didn't help. Good thing I have homework to keep me busy until 1 am.

Oh one more thing. My backpack isn't as heavy as I thought it would be. And no, I'm not complaining.

Awkward Email Photos

I opened an email yesterday from Kate.
There was not text in the email.
Just a picture.

So rude. She knows I'm deathly afraid of midgets.

But that's why I love her. 

It made me laugh. Real hard.

The gag reflex

Fact: Playing the skittle game with a weak stomach is the worst idea on the face of the planet.
Fact: Whoever said the skittle game was fun, is completely, and utterly mental. Never in my life have I woken up so sick. I'm almost positive the hundreds of skittles I ate last night, are still trying to digest in my stomach. Let me tell you, it's not a good feeling. At all. Unfortunately I was the fool who purchased these wretched things, and am stuck with a 41 ounce back. If anyone is in a strange need of a large amount of skittles, contact me.

And yes, that is indeed, my morning fetus face.

I'd worry about me if I were you.

When I take the time to obsess over things, they are usually things that no one can relate to. On rare occasion, people can relate to them. Most of the time, i'm looked upon as a freak. And that's okay.
Here is a list of my recent obsessions:

• PB&J Sandwiches cut into triangles, with a glass of cold milk.
• Freshly cut mangos for eating and also smelling.
• Cheesy, ridiculous, Japanese Anime. It's entertaining at 1 am. Otherwise, it's just embarrassing at my age.
• Saltine Crackers at 1 am.
• Yo Mama Jokes.
• Knock Knock Jokes
• Animal Crossing Video game. Biggest waste of time in the world. "You stole my virtual flowers!!"
• And frozen yogurt with fruity pebbles.

If you have judged me in anyway while reading this, I'm sorry I'm not as cool as you thought. Here's a Yo mama joke to make your day a little more comical.

"Yo mama so stupid, she thought fruit punch was a gay boxer."

Psych

Newest Obsession.

Hello? Where have I been, and why didn't anyone tell me about this fabulous show?! Two handsome, hilarious men? Of course I love it! Craving more of this show. Ahh. Must. Rent. Seasons.

The Motherly Curse

Guarantee, almost every mom on the planet has this curse.
The curse of chatter. Especially "phone call chatter."
This is why most teenagers ignore phone calls from their parents. Okay, either that or they are up to no good. The minute you answer the phone, you get yourself into a one-way conversation.

To make this more enjoyable/entertaining whilst stuck in this awkward ramble, do the following:

1. Make obnoxious tooting noises. It's real fun if you're immature like me. Although, sometimes it causes some scolding.
2. Find different ways to say "Okay", such as "Uh huh", "You know it", "Yup", "Will do", "Sure", "Mmk", "Sounds good", etc. Throw in a different language to add some more spice. Particularly Spanish.
3. Maybe just to shake it up, pull the phone a couple feet away from your face, and give a blood curdling scream in the middle of her speech. It will obviously get you in a butt load of trouble, but my gracious, the reaction is worth it.
4. Don't be a brat. Especially don't give them sass. Trust me, it makes problems.
5. Talk in either a British/Mexican/Indian/German/French accent. If she notices, it's too strong of an accent. So keep practicing for the next time she calls.

Make it fun. Don't be embarrassed by your parents talking your ear off. It's a common occurance.